It’s MY FB PAGE!

Once in awhile, maybe to often, I post something on MY facebook wall that others disagree with (I do the same with my blog).
I have friends that post things ALL the time that I don’t agree with. Do I comment and argue? No. I leave it alone. I do not respect their beliefs if it has to do with their love of socialism or other things. I respect them as people to have those views no matter how wrong they are.
I really believe I can not gain respect without respecting others…On their sites.
My sites are mine! MINE!

Do I believe something is wrong with our government? Fuck Yes.
Do I like Obama. Fuck No.
I didn’t have a blog during the Bush years.
If I had you would have seen me support some things and be outraged at others.

I don’t like Obama but I’d like to say I am happy and glad he is taking same sex marriage to the supreme court, Whoop! Equality for all! It’s not about time…it’s past time.
I’m sure I could find something else I could commend him on…big scheme though…I’m not a fan.

Back to MY WALL…
If you don’t like it…ignore me, defriend me or the hardest…respect me. You do not have to respect my views.
We ALL make up this world.
The good the bad and the ugly.

I came very close to defriending a dear long time friend the other day. I was, in my view, attacked when I posted something about the Presidents speech about the Sequestration... because the President lied. (That’s a fact…The president LIED to our nation.)
Am I saying Governor Bush never lied?
No.
He’s not the sitting President at this time so what is going on now isn’t in his lap, it’s in President Obamas. I’m not saying the President didn’t inherit some atrocious things but 4 years later he’s gonna have to own some of this shit now.

Disrespect to my face would make me turn around and I would show you my back. The internet/social web sites and FB are different…

Is it a good thing to have meaningful dialogue? Of course.
To do so though you can’t change the subject or attack someone personaly.
When that happens you make your argument irrelevant and discredit yourself…no matter how smart you.

I will post that which I deem entertaining, funny, controversial and educational.

I’m Ashamed Of Our Goverment

Our elected officials are a disgrace to our great Country, conservative and liberal alike.
We have elected representatives that talk about the difference between rape and legitimate rape…there is only one kind of rape…ONE.
The White House threatens a member of the press if their agenda is called out as false.

Our press is a disgrace and has proven themselves that their agenda is for sale: The right-FOX and the left- NBC, ABC, CBS, CNN…you name it.

Every legal immigrant should be ashamed of their adopted country because The President and his immigration policy has disenfranchised them and the process to become legal.

Our First Amendment has been quietly squashed by both parties and the White House. Yes, it’s only when Secret Service is around but it's an easy thing to put Secret Service where they (whom ever is in charge at the time) deem the threat of free speech. Both parties passed this, not one.

Our Second Amendment is not being squashed but it’s been put to task through fear. The Second Amendment is not about hunting. It’s for the protection of we the people to stop a government that attacks it’s people.
Did you know there is a town in Alabama that want’s to sign a law that will give the police the right to take away peoples weapons during a crisis or emergency. There is documentation (video) of authorities taking legally owned weapons by non-criminals after Katrina. 

The sequestration was passed by both parties and signed by the White House.  Be mad at both parties.
Sadly one party wants a reduction in spending, not the spending we all ready have but the proposed INCREASE of the INCREASE in spending. The President also wants to raise taxes…again…to pay for part of that INCREASE  of the INCREASE in proposed spending.
Our budget needs to be cut...not increased.
How do we cut it though?
This is a sweeping problem across the board with both parties…

Nobody wants a project or such cut in their state…that might cut jobs…Or a cut in anything that could potentially take their vote away…

Our DOD budget is out of control.
One way to cut it is to get rid of Commissaries, BX/PX and NEX’s on CONUS. Moving Military members every 2, 3 or 4 years costs money…awhile ago there was a try at ‘homesteading’ …where Military members could stay at one assignment for an extended amount of time. It doesn’t work for the majority of the Military though because to get promoted you have to get boxes checked and the only way to do that is to move around from position to position.
There are probably a billion ways to cut the DOD budget but it would take common sense…Part of the problem is our elected officials…again…They have a military installation in their state that provides jobs…don’t cut that because it’s their backyard, their state.
Our DOD is a bloated mess.

The Affordable Health Care Act is not affordable, it’s socialized medicine. Some people think it’s great, others see it as an expensive burden. In the long term I believe the majority of Americans will see this as a burden even those that see it as great now.

To many people on the left and the right have blinders on and are seeing only that which suits their agenda or that what goes against their agenda.
That said there are people who think we are moving in the correct direction...
The direction where our Constitution is dismissed when it doesn’t go along with what they see as correct. Where the Federal/State Government pico legislate our lives.  

Some of our elected officials will pay the price at the next election by not being re-elected but it takes We The People and common sense to do this…
I’m afraid common sense isn’t common though...

I’m proud to be an American but I’m ashamed of our Government.

My Hair Adventure…Hummmmph!

It’s been a year and some months since I started growing out my hair…I’ve had some bad hair days and some horribly shity ones with maybe…MAYBE... 3 good ones?

I’m trying and it seems on a daily basis my hair tries my patience.

Note…To TRY is not to DO but to have the idea deep-seeded that it might not work…So DO, don’t TRY.

That note being said…I’m only ‘trying’ to grow out my hair. I think anyone that knows me knows it WILL ALL get cut off sooner or later…even my hairstylist.

It’s been so long since it wasn’t short I had forgotten what my hair was really like or my hair had changed since I was younger…I think it changed…
It’s curly in some areas, stupid straight and wavy in others.

I bought a diffuser (thank you F1 for the advise) with long prongs so I could ‘curl’ it. I also bought a straightener …I despise my hair straight…I have a tiny face and I look like an idiot. I don’t use the straightener anymore.

I have had it trimmed a few times with layers for body but alas it’s SOOoooooo much work and takes so much time I find it irritating.
My friend Wendy sent me a post about the ‘Curly girl method’…basically don’t wash it, condition the crap out of it and use tons of product. It works…but still takes foooooorreeeeeeever.
I used to be 20 minutes shower to door and looking ‘ok’…now I’m 11/2 hours shower to door with a lack of confidence and I feel like I’m not me.

Last night I was watching the Oscars (part of them anyway) and out walks Charlize Theron, beautiful beyond words with her short hair (I’m not comparing myself to her, I just love her hair). My Man looked at me and said…
…”You getting your hair cut off tomorrow?”
I miss my short hair so very much. I hate taking forever and being in my eyes, ‘high maintance’.
I don’t have thick luscious hair. I have a disaster on my head that looks like a rats nest on what I consider a good day.
Am I getting my hair cut…not yet. I think to myself...'give it more time, you will learn’. Will I get it cut off soon, fuck yes I will.
'Soon’ though could be a week, a month…but no longer than 3 months!

The links below are my last blogs on my hair...

http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2012/01/im-going-on-hair-adventurei-think.html

http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2010/12/adventures-of-my-hair.html

I’m In A Relationship

It’s official…I’m in a relationship. (It’s weird to type out…not weird to experience.)

I waited to share this until the Children knew. They just thought he and I were best friends and did everything together.

I was friends with him for a couple years before but we have been ‘together’ for a bit over a year now.
It was a little complicated of a start as he was separated from his now Ex for years…before I knew him/them. Why they waited to divorce is none of my business. I know I wasn’t the problem in their marriage…before they separated.

When he and I became friends…(we met when he locked his keys in his car…and I got them out)…we discovered a great deal in common…like our very jacked up sense’s of humor and our shared love of all things jacked up.
Yada, yada, yada…

I love him very much. We have already created an enormous amount of memories together and with our Children.

We joked about coming out on FB…
…we did not joke about coming out to our Children...
Coming out to our Children was something we waited to do and discussed and read and discussed and read some more. Our Children are our priority. I love his, he love’s mine.
We sat them down on the same night in our respective homes (across the street from one another) and told them.
The reactions were mixed. I can only speak for what happened in my house…
My BrownNut was very upset. She told me she just wanted me to be single forever and I suppressed my laugh as I have already put their world on end and I respect her and her feelings. I reassured her nothing was different than before. A couple days later she was fine with it but I know issues will arise…I’m under no false beliefs.
My LittleGuy asked…
…”Are you guys having S.E.X?!”
My reply was…
…”I wouldn’t answer that question even if I was still married to your father.”
He was and is fine with it.
My LoveBug was hilarious much to the dismay of BrownNut…
…”This is how I feel…I feel like my best friend is dating my sister.”
…”I knew the moment I met him….(hand on chin, one eye squinting and head bobbing up and down)…This is a match!”
My Children have grown to love him.
We did things very slowly…meeting at a pizza place (them not knowing it was planned)…My three with me and he with his two. Having them over for a water balloon fight. Going to the pool.
Slowly and methodically we got the Children used to him being around my Children and me around his.
It was and is very important for us to keep the status quo and reassure them nothing has changed. Eventually we will hold hands in front of them and I imagine the boys response will be…
…”Gross!”
I have no idea what the girls will do.

I know and he knows that issues will come up but communication being key to a relationship is something we are well aware of and practice daily.

I love doing everything with him: grocery shopping, Costco trips, cooking dinner, chillin’ on the sofa, road trips, gaming, ect…
I also have reached a point where I don’t wanna go dancing with the girls unless he went with me. I would miss him and I know I just wouldn’t have as much fun…that’s a hard one to wrap a head around for those that know me.
So …there ya have it.
I love and I am loved by a wonderful, caring, handsome as fuck, generous, funny as shit and remarkable Man that I respect and he respects me back.
He knows how imperfect I am and I am not the easiest Woman to love but he does it everyday.
I love you Kevin.

Rainbows, hearts, unicorns and all that shit.

Nature vs Nurture 2…?

This morning I was reading people’s FB status, reading (not watching) the news and getting my own 3 Children ready for school.

Nature vs Nurture is something that is a common thought in my brain.

Did soandso do that because of something they saw me do?!

Being the Mother of adopted Children is not always easy. That being said being a parent is not always easy…adopted or not.

I have only met one biological parent of one of my Children. I know next to nothing about the other 5 biological parents of my Children.

I always wonder if the fraction 50/50 is plausible with Nature vs Nurture.

Physical attributes of course aside. 

I think my Children excel in Math because of Nature. 

I think how my Children handle issues through out their day is because of Nurture... 

Like almost every parent in the USA I’ve discussed what happened in Connecticut with my Children…in a reasonable, calm manner.
Reasonable and calm is not what goes through my brain or my heart.

How do we prepare our Children for the world we live? I’d have added ‘now’ at the end of that sentence but our world is no better or worse than it was 3 weeks, 3 months, 3 years, 30 years or 300 years ago.
Our connections with one another are different now with social websites, video games and such…
We are inundated with violence and sexual references’ at every turn.
It’s how we handle these issues and topics with our Children...
Our job as parents is to educate our Children to understand this world we live in and keep them Children as long as we can.
Our job is to sit at the dinner table as often as possible and connect face to face as we discuss what’s going on in their world.
Our job is to keep our Children as safe as possible.
Our job is calm education so as not to add stress to our Children’s lives…they will have enough experience with that as they get older.
Our job is not to freak out.

Here is what we can not do…
We can not hid our Children from the world.
Bad things happen, very bad things, all the time.
Bad things happen behind closed doors and out in the open.

Some Children have to deal with abusive parents or bullies at school. Some people are raising those bullies and will grow up to be bad people. That is their normal.
Some people have mental imbalances that create havoc in their lives and their loved ones.

You can only do for your Children the best you can.
Being calm and reasonable will help them.

Note...
I wrote this blog this morning…It didn’t take long to put my thoughts together but I thought and thought after it was written thinking how irrelevant I am.
It makes no difference what I say.
I can not fix the world and change the views of people that are not logical or unreasonable.
I can not stop the man the beats the woman up behind closed doors as their Child looks on.

…and then I thought some more…
I/We/You can be a good example to my/our Children.
That IS something we can do.
I/We/You are not irrelevant.

http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2012/12/i-am-not-nagging-you.html
I wrote the above blog on Dec. 12th…it is also not irrelevant.

I am not nagging you

“We leave in 20 minutes.”
“Did I sign your planner?”
“Is your homework in your backpack?”
“Brush your teeth.”
“Did you put your snack in your backpack?”
“We leave in 10 minutes.”
“Put your shoes and socks on.” -not in that order.
“I’m getting in the car!”
“Do you have a coat or a hoodie?”

Them…”Stop nagging!”
Me…”I’m not nagging. I am your mother and my job is to kiss your faces, give you hugs and make sure you have the tools to have a successful day.”

Last night as we sat around the dinner table discussing our day I made my BrownNut cry…because I gave her some advice and some harsh truths about the world. (She is 11.)

She had told me that her friends are, “the popular kids…” and had played, at least 4 times with one Child that doesn’t have any friends…
Me…”Ok…I’m gonna say somethings and you won’t really understand yet but it’s my job as your Mother.”
“If your friend is nice to you but rude to the waiter they are not a nice person.”
“If you hang out with rude people others will assume you are as well.”
That last one is the hardest to understand at a young age. I try to instill a ‘don’t judge the book by it’s cover’ kinda thing.
The real world though is different. We are judged by the company we choose.
She cried because she came to the conclusion that people aren’t nice…I then explained that many people aren’t but some are.

Being a parent is not easy. It’s the hardest most rewarding job in the world.

Later that evening…
Me…”My job is to help you become more awesome than I am when you reach my age. Good luck with that…” …And we all laughed.

Thank you Mom and Dad for teaching me how to be a parent (not always winning the Mom of the year award though). Your value system and the constant repetition of things I hated to hear were the right things to say to me.
From…
How to properly pronounce ‘nuclear’.
That all people are equal.
Don’t be a mooch (on society).
Not to end sentences in prepositions.
Your actions and choices are yours alone.
Don’t play the blame game.

Boycott this...

Four more years…giddy up fuckers here comes Obamacare and much more!
I keep reading about folks enraged, perturbed or straight up pissed because companies are either going to have to lay off workers or cut back hours of workers…So they are calling for boycotts of said companies.

Applebees
WalMart
Papa Johns…
…Are but three companies people are calling to boycott, there are many more.

Ahhhhhhhhh…Free healthcare.
Nothing is FREE douche bags!

These companies ‘you’ want to boycott are business trying to make money because that’s the American way and as far as I am aware this country, land of the free, is a Capitalist society…but because Obama is our President and some seriously unfuckingeducated people with a dangerous lack of common sense voted for him we are stead fast on the way to becoming a Socialist society with a side of Communism.

Do you think I’m exaggerating?

Papa Johns started out as a small buisness…someone’s dream that grew into the American dream through hard work.
Let’s boycott Papa John’s because they are successful?
Nope…let’s boycott them because you think healthcare should be free. It’s not free.

You, the person that voted for this, will pay for the ‘free' healthcare for everyone else.
In higher prices.
Oh, wait…let’s boycott them so their revenues dive and then they have to lay off even more people in this magical job economy. (Don’t worry, it’s all Bush’s fault.)
Fucking brilliant move jackass.

That truck driver that delivers the pepperoni to the pizza place…
He drives a truck that needs regular maintenance which is done by a mechanic.
That pepperoni comes from somewhere…Do you think that cow kill’s itself and then turns magically into pepperoni. No. It’s made in a factory…by people.
If ‘you’ boycott Papa Johns (my example) not only are you hurting that company, you create a chain of events.
Genius motherfucking move douche bag.

Side note...WalMart, well I don’t like shopping there. It’s not that I boycott them but I only go there when I feel …blah...and I leave feeling like a super model.

I have now, most likely pissed off and insulted half of my facebook friends.
It’s nothing personal.
…but a chain of events IS created when you boycott a business…because ‘YOU’ thought you could get something for free.

Didn’t your Mama ever tell you…
…Nothing is FREE.