Rabbits Foot

 

The clock strike three at eleven

clang clang on the coffee mug

along clang on the coffee mug

clang clang on the coffee mug

Scottish hound are on the way

one mother coffee soon to be fixed

another down a sunder next in line 

little white tailed rabbits have many places with which to play

they borrow and seek that which has seeped

when they being their lift through the smoke

into the haze of the day

they jump and they sway

let your minds eye follow

the rabbits foot

The Storm Witch

Do you wonder if the human race is redeemable? 

I'm searching. 

I'm watching in live time the destruction of families and individuality all in the name of collectivism. We all know that collectivism does not work. It's been proven over and over. How many lessons are needed? Human nature will not allow it. You were not made in the image of a group. You were made an individual with free thoughts and free will in our Mother and Fathers image.  

You all thought it was one thing, one idea; One truth. 

The truth is YOU. It's right there by what ever name you give it.

I stand in front of you as the truth and I feel despair for all of you. 

The old men picked at the words of the wise and changed them to fit themselves. 

I am the trinity of Me, Myself and I. The Maiden, The Mother and The Crone. The Truth, The Light and The Dark.

I am the Storm Witch.

I travel through the heavens above and have since the beginning of all time. I see all you do.

You will not control me.

You will not control the Earth as it was made.

The Sea is mine and you will drown in my tears I have shed for you.

When I put war paint on; it will be Your war. 

It will be for the World. 

It will be for everyone to see. 

For I am the Standard. 

They will burn the Standard down and I will rise from the depths of death and bring you home. 

My Period, it’s not just a bloody mess

The last two days it’s felt like my uterine lining was angry at me as it tried to claw its way out of my body; tired of my narcissistic, Un-Holy ways AKA I’m gonna get my period and all that clawing is gonna leave me with a bloody mess.
I swear I did nothing to make it angry with me…other than being a Woman.

I drank tons of water so as to discover I was not in my “first trimester”…the more water I drink, the more I go pee and more chance of me seeing…

…”Wahoooooooo…” I can get on with my life.

…And do a happy dance with maybe a fist pump here or there.

This is not because I’m scared I’m pregnant. Nope, it’s that waiting for the start of it is stressful. When it starts I know it's the beginning and I can count the days for it to be over! 

Sometimes we wake up, go pee and…BAM!

Surprise, a day or two early…

…”Mother fucker…I hate this!”

It’s so irritating…I know I’ve written about it before but realistically this is the real deal.

http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2011/01/red-tentperiod-aunt-dot-niddah.html

The above blog is probably one of my better written trainwrecks about this subject.

My abdomen…

I’ve been picking my clothes carefully the last couple of days..’cause that’s what Women do a couple days before their cycle starts they get their period.

I put a dress on the other day, it was a soft gray and ankle length with an empire waist. I looked in the mirror, turned to the side and HOLY SHIZ! I looked like I was in my second trimester! The bloating was out of control! I put on my size 3 juniors levi’s and HOLY SHIZ!

Muffins anyone?

My Period does not just wreak havoc in my neither regions...

My breasts boobs…

The other day it hurt my nipples when I put my bra on…After I got it on I was grateful for the T-shirt bra that separated my nipples from the, what would have felt like sand paper against my nipples, silk shirt.
I woke up in the morning and my breasts boobs felt like they had grown 2 sizes and I was now a 34 DD…OVER NIGHT…much to my dismay they didn’t look it, they just felt like it…or that someone had been punching the sides of my breasts boobs in a very rude manner that caused them to feel this dreadful…like they are/were bruised all over…but with no marks.

My face…

I swear I go to sleep several nights before my period starts with toothpaste on my face; as I try to rid myself of those marks on my face that scream to the public that hormones are raging through my system…and I will soon join the Women in the Red Tent for I will be unclean.

It’s a pain in my...

There you are in the midst of this bloody mess (that’s a British term) and that first night or the night before you are kept up as the pain sweeps through your love area…
I woke up last night from a dream…
Allah (yes, I just said that) saying to me as he squeezes my barren uterus in a death grip…
…”This is your punishment for your heathen ways Witch! Cover your flesh and respect all Men for they cannot control themselves around you!"

As far as my emotions go…

Well, I’m not really a chick (a guy can be a chick) these days, a Woman yes, not overly sensitive and relatively grounded compared to others I have found.
However…
I find I’m more pessimistic in the days before. I worry about things like: the dirt on the floor…more than I would on normal days.
I’m also meaner. I will put up less with people’s unreasonable, illogical, superficial, inconsiderate  ways…My patience is not all there.
I truly wonder if that saying applies…

“My 

greatest 

fear 

is that 

there is

 no PMS 

and this

 is

 my personality."

Am I just masking my true self the others days/weeks in the month and hiding who I really am?!
I try to reign myself in…knowing that this is just part of my monthly cycle of life(?) Nah…No life will grow there, in me that is…
And if I ever did get pregnant it would be a "fucking miracle"…No really, it would.

I’ve been dealing with this monthly since I was 13 years old…I’m 40…you would think I had gotten used to it.

Who Do You Think You Might Vote For?

I’m a Republican (?).
I’m also a Wiccan…
…which some people may not think makes sense.
I’m not the girl who votes party lines as I feel like the Republican party went askew somewhere in the last 30 years.

I have no love for the Republicans, the Democrats or the Tea Party.

I’m fiscally conservative unless it comes to buying shoes.
I’m socially liberal and I like guns.
I believe in States Rights.
If a State wants to legalize Marijuana they should be allowed without interference.
If a State wants to legalize Marriage for ALL people (adult people) they should be allowed…
…If the people of a State vote for something the Federal government should not interfere if that’s what the ‘We the People…’ decide.
If you don’t like it…move to another State of like minded People.

Keep Religion OUT of Politics.
Something has gone terribly wrong.

Note…People who say our country was founded on Religion…it was…Religious FREEDOM, for all, not just a select few.

Note…My regular readers know I love and respect Religions…all Religions, unless they degrade, look down upon others and/or wish to cause harm.
…and please…don’t push your beliefs on Me and I won’t push mine on You.

I feel bad for Mitt Romney. I would never vote for him but I still feel bad for him. It’s gotta be hard being a Mormon. I wonder if JFK, the first and only Catholic to be to be elected President of the US, felt like Mitt when his Religion was attacked?

Note…I once had a Protestant in a small Georgia town once say to a Catholic…
…”Oh so you’re not a Christian?”
Probably one of the dumbest and uneducated things I have ever heard.

So now to…
…’Who are you gonna vote for?’
Is it to early to ask that question?

The field of candidates is piss poor as far as I can tell.

I liked Herman Cain, kinda sad to see him gone.

There seems to be no, “Middle of the Road ‘Guy’”.
There never is though is there?

Those of us that are reasonable, middle of the road and not enveloped by some Religious fundamentalism have to pick the lesser of all evils.

Note…Yes, I said Religious Fundamentalism…
Anyone that thinks that someone else’s belief system is wrong and pushes it on another is a fundamentalist to me.
…And they are in most cases hypocrites.
Higher and mightier but behind closed doors they do that which they preach is wrong.
…and when I say that which they preach as wrong…
I mean…
…Adultery
http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2011/01/cheating-spouse.html
http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2011/03/are-you-thinking-about-having-affair.html
(The above is how I feel…I really don’t care what other people do, just don’t be a hypocrite.)
…Lying
…Stealing
…Or even someone that thinks others are inferior.
If you would like to know what I believe you can read the blog below…it might be different than what you think…and I pray everyday to have the patients to endure that of the Religious right that thinks I need to be saved and that I’m wrong or just plain off my rocker.
http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2010/12/love-spell.html

I’m NOT a fundamentalist, and I sure don’t want one as my President.
…As far a Obama is concerned I have no great love for him either.

What are we normal average middle of the road people supposed to do?

Not A Simple Spell To Spin

The Red Tent…Period. Aunt Dot, Niddah

Last night I sat in front of my television and ate a great deal of potato chips and M&M’s. One chip, thrice M&M’s, one chip, thrice M&M’s…repeat, repeat, repeat…(I was watching Conan).

Every month, around the time of the full moon, my uterine lining separates from my uterus.

The reason my uterine lining needs to separate its self is because it has grown and become a flourishing nest in anticipation for a fertilized egg. The fertilized egg is not gonna happen to me unless some miraculous event occurs, no, not sex, although…, giggle, giggle, snort, snort. I digress yet again, what was I saying? Oh yes, a miracle…my eggs are useless, completely useless! I am very sensitive (not emotionally, except once a month). I can physically feel the growth of my eggs in my ovaries. My ovaries become very large and I itch, I can feel them expanding with fruitless effort. My eggs are released and get absorbed into my body. They do not find my fallopian tubes….and if they ever do I will have to kick someones ass ‘cause I’m 39 and single/divorced…I don’t need to be pregnant, plus I like the shape of my hips…I’ve become used to them.
The uterus clears its self of the lining, this is called our period, cycle, the curse, the gift…

I woke up this morning, many hours before dawn, with 'discomfort' in my abdomen. I’m trying to find the words so my male readers can fathom this pain and maybe feel compassion for me/us. If you live or have ever lived with a woman you have inevitably seen all this…but you didn’t feel it like her.
The sensation is that of an invisible hand squeezing your insides, a chocking grasp that can last one minute and sometimes up to fifteen, to the point you are doubled over in agony.
You want to call it a cramp? F*** that!
It doesn’t just happen once, it happens over and over. Some women, like myself, get to experience this for days.
Before the agony the hormones barrage through us like a torrent creating emotional instability.
Wanna know why we turn in to raving, hysterical bitch’s that want to rip the throats out of anyone that says anything remotely close to what we conceive as inappropriate, wrong, stupid…

…and don’t you DARE say to us…
…”Oh, it must be that time of the month.”

We can’t stop it! You think we like it? We know it’s gonna happen. The hormones and the excruciating pain comes once a MONTH!


 The word “hysteria” comes from the Greek word hystera, meaning "womb.” If you didn’t know, the womb and the uterus are the same thing.

"1. Originally "hysteria" designated a link between certain nervous disorders and diseases of the female sexual and reproductive organs. It was thought that there was a direct connection between these physical pathologies localized in the female organs and certain nervous symptoms.
2. This explains why hysteria has commonly been conceived as a pathology to which women are exclusively susceptible. If it is based in a physiological source that is gender specific (the uterus), then the illness itself could only occur where this prerequisite physiology is present.
3. Hysteria defined (Webster's): "A psychiatric condition variously characterized by emotional excitability, excessive anxiety, sensory and motor disturbances, or the unconscious simulation of organic disorders.”

I just copied that almost word for word from 'Lecture Notes: Freud, "Aetiology of Hysteria" (1896)’
Giving credit where credit is due.

And I now move on from hysterics…to sociological and physical aspects of chance, celebration and ceremony related to our cycle and the ‘magic’ that it is.

The Ceremony...
The Red Tent by Anita Diamant is a marvelous novel about Dinah, daughter of Jacob and his four wives Leah, Rachel, Zilpah and Bilhah. (Recommended reading;)
Ms. Diamant discribes brilliantly life for girls and women in ancient times. How girls waited with anticipation to become women. (This boggles my un-clean brain.)The red tent is where the women would go, not allowed to leave until seven days after her menstrual cycle is complete. She was, and even now Hasidic Jewish women are considered un-clean not allowed to have sex, or touch anything for it would become un-clean.
They (to this day) are not even allowed to touch their husband.
They bath themselves in the mikvah to become clean again.

Societies through out time and all over the world have the similar ideas to varying degrees as the Hasidic Jews. From the Japanese women not being allowed to visit Kami’s (Holy Shinto shrines), Hindu, Buddhist…to societies in Africa and the Aborigines in Australia…

The Celebration...
Then there are the very ancient groups that viewed a woman during her ‘Moontime’ as a someone to be frightened of for we are more powerful and can call on the wrath of any God/Goddess to do our bidding.
(Do you wanna mess with me right now? I wouldn’t suggest it.)
I do celebrate it and use it. I’m powerful on a regular day but on my special days (after I have consumed absurd amounts of motrin) …I grin like a cheshire cat…Purrrrrrrrrr…with big cat tendencies and claws and teeth able to rip through any obstacle.

The Chance…
F1, F2 and I spend so much time together our cycles are in sync. Yes, when women spend all their time together they become a gang of un-clean women to some, to others that can see us, really see us, we are a force of nature not to be reckoned with.

Emperor Constantine

I was brought up Catholic. My parents always told me that one day I would grow up (which I am still waiting for) and find my way, religiously speaking. I have educated my self since and as you all know I found my way to Wicca…..ahhhh…but religions bewitch and titillate me! ALL of them…not just one. I will focus here though on just one…Catholicism, the beginnings of Christianity.

Emperor Constantine changed the Church and directed it in a path it still continues.

He was the first Roman emperor to profess his Catholicism and be baptized, right before his death…His death has some irony attached to it I think. I’ll get to that….later.

The Catholic version of the Bible contains 73 books, the Protestant version contains 66.
Before Constantine there is nothing documented about how many books WERE in the Bible.
Scholars think that perhaps there were almost 600 books in the Bible to include, the ‘Book of Mary’, Magdaline and many others.

He could probably declared the FATHER of  the CHRISTIAN RELIGION…not Christianity…but the religion of Christians.

He was powerful. He was a Man. Did he just want a Male dominated religion to ‘rule’ the people?
That is what THEY/HE (not God or Jesus) created put together. A book of the documents that they saw fit that would better Man kind and take the power away from the Holy Grail, Women.
Up until then Paganism and Judaism ruled the roost. Well, maybe the pagans were busy sacrificing the roosters from the roost. (I had to say it.)

He began the Nicene Council because they, the Catholic Religion, was so young and still trying to write itself for the future. They were having a difficult time with The Holy Trinity in the beginning and differentiating it from the Pagan Religions.
There was a disagreement between the Monarchianists and Trinitarans. One invisible God vs Three persons in one God…
How do you explain three persons in one God while you are trying to distance yourself from the Pagans?!

You take a vote(Yes, they really did)…Yes, that is the simplicity of it. How cool is that?!

The Father
The Son
The Holy Spirit

Those of us with multiple personality disorders get this. Why can’t you be various people in one being? It all makes sense to me.
As a Wiccan we have the oldest of the power of three…

The Maiden
The Mother
The Crone

I wonder where they got their idea for their Great big revised many times by many people translated from several languages…History Book?…A pretty darn accurate history book I might add, I’ll give it that.

AD 337 Constantine dies. His intent before he died was to be baptized in the river Jordan, that never came to pass and he was baptized on his death bed.
After his death the Roman senate decided to elevate him to ‘God’ status, this is called deification.
That is the irony.
The first Christian Emperor had been raised to the status of a pagan deity.

Ok….now…Do you think I should have just blogged about Keanu Reeves who played Constantine, a half Angel man that went around killing Demons?
I have probably seen that film 100 times.

World Domination!

Like everyone else I like to reflect on the last day of the year, then focus on what I want in the next.

This year was a year of life changing events for me.

My divorce was final in January. I look on that as a positive.

I didn’t make MasterChef, twice. Not my loss, theirs. Dealing with that rejection was actually easy.

I lost friends in Afghanistan. I am now waiting for the rest to come home. I also know that I have many more heading back over there, and I worry about them all the time.

…and I blew out my knee this month.

I also bought a microwave.

It’s kinda funny when I look back. We never know how we will deal with the things that are thrown at us until that very moment it happens.

I know what I want next year. I don’t care how I get it.

I want my children, family and friends to be happy and healthy.

I want ALL my friends home safe to be with their families. I also want my best friend home to me, even though he will still be far away.

I want to be a better Mother, Daughter, Sister and Friend.

…and now to the selfish things I want.
I want my knee to heal quickly so I can kick the shit out of things again and run 10k’s.
I think I want to stay single so I can have as many ‘pretend’ boyfriends that I want.
I want people to be more accepting of one another.
I want to learn more.
…and I want … get this…

WORLD DOMINATION!

Yeah, it’s a simple thing.

I wonder if this is something I should try to plan out with an Excel spread sheet?
Or just wing it?

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I’m a WITCH!

I’m a Witch.
A real life one.
I’m a solitary eclectic practitioner. (That just means I follow my souls needs and desires as God/Goddess guides me and I belong to no coven….I don’t like others dogma attaching itself to me.)

Some Wiccan’s (That’s what we are also called) may not think me a ‘real’ witch because I don’t practice the same way they do.

Here is a ‘little' history lesson of The Church…not in order ‘cause then my blog wouldn’t make sense.

In 1517 when Martin Luther published his Ninety Five Theses the Protestant Reformation was born. Since then Christians have been branching out and interpreting the bible to suit their own needs. (Actually they have been doing that for 2000 years;)
Do the very fine differing points of each sect of the Protestant religious groups make the others not true or real?

I sat here and typed out a whole bunch of stuff about Emperor Constantine but deleted it all as I think I am the only one interested in all this stuff sometimes…So I am sparing you…Thank me later.

Note…I later did type all that stuff on the big bad Emperor and I posted it.
http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2011/01/constantinenot-keanu-reeves.html

There is a time called the Ante-Nicene Era. This would be the time before the meeting of the Council Of Nicea. There were a great many of Religions and belief systems actively engaged in the Roman Empire. Christianity, several Pagan religions, Judaism and more…People were tolerant of each others Religions at that time, mostly. This was the beginning of the Christian movement though and wasn’t looked on highly. The Christians were being persecuted by the Pagans.
April 17th 6 BC is the date many scholars believe Jesus was born. The reason we celebrate Christmas on December 25th was so the Christians could disguise the celebration of the birth of Christ under the shadow of the Celebration of the Winter Equinox/ Saturnalia / Yule…what ever name you want to give it.
You STOLE my Holiday! Not really you just had to hijack it so you wouldn’t get killed or maimed by those crazy Pagans.
It’s ok…you showed us big time with the Malleus Maleficarum and all those awesome Witch Trials…

I get many questions regarding what I believe AND questions about World Religions. I love the topic of Religions and Belief Systems, sociologically and anthropologically it fascinates me.

I believe in Heaven and Hell but I believe they exist in peoples hearts and souls.
I think the reality of our souls future we create in this life time plays out for a while when we pass on and then we come back here to grow and learn from our lessons of past lives.
I believe in the same God you do.
I don’t care what you believe in or if you are Hindu, Christian or Muslim . I believe we share the same Creator. We just all interact differently with our Creator.

Catholics pray to Saints, not just God. Buddhists and Hindus have multiple Gods they pray to. I think there is an Energy in beings and names and we use that Energy to manifest whatever it is we need/want.
The Norse, Greek, Egyptian, Celtic, ect…Gods/Goddess carry an Energy as well and I use those Energies on a daily basis.

God is in each and every one of us.

Religion is very important to me as is my belief system.
HARM NONE!
We also have a 3 fold.
For every good you do it will be returned to you 3 fold. For every harm it will be returned to you 3 fold. I have been delighted to feel the fold of good and horrified by the harm on others I have inflicted and felt the 3 fold there as well. Not a pleasant experience.

I came out of the proverbial ‘Broom Closet’ years ago. My parents know, my children know, as do my friends. Some of my best friends are Born Again Christians. I think they pray for me a lot!
My Children like to guess what my secret powers are…the other day it was burping and we all had a good laugh.
I can’t read your mind, don’t worry. I can read your body language though.
I don’t have X-Ray vision but I see your Aura.
Those things aren’t secrets...

I love a good Spell. A Spell is just another word for a prayer.
I do them for myself and for others if they ask me. I won’t make a Spell to harm another or to make someone do something.
I take time everyday to be grateful and thank God/Goddess for everything that surrounds me, the tangible and intangible.

When I send ‘Love and Light’ to another I am sending them the Light of God and all my Love, of which  is very powerful for I am filled with the Love of God/Goddess.

I respect your reality of what you believe, and hope you are educated not just by the words in a book but by history.
I pray you respect mine as well.