The Herman Cain Affair

This is gonna be short.
Herman Cain had an affair, allegedly(?). A 13 year long one.

This is where I stand.
I could care less.
Oh wait, that’s not true.
I do care…
Ginger White, if she had any scruples, would have kept her mouth shut.

I don’t care who sleeps with whom.
She said it’s not political and he shouldn’t be President.
Not political my ass.

I raise my glass to you Ms. White...
“To your 15 minutes, Ginger!"

When a person in a powerful position has an affair…
…they need to make sure it cannot be used against them.
I mean in several ways.
Against their family of course (nobody wants to see another hurt).
…and
Most importantly...
...by another Country.

Am I silly or ridiculous for feeling this way? Nah.

I don’t care if someone has an affair.
But if you do…Newt Gingrich…
…Don’t have a double standard.

Ms. White had an affair with a married Man.
I wonder if she feels jilted?
She knew he was married.
If you are going to do something like this…ya know sleep with married Men…
…don’t expect jack shit from them…
AND
…KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT ABOUT IT!

Or ya could wait years down the road and write a tell all book…
Or not.

KillingLinguist

A cunning linguist is someone who understands words, languages, how to put a sentence together and enunciate words…
…properly.

Note…Please don’t think this will be boring scroll towards the bottom if you must.
Boring I am not scroll to the bottom must you hard headed be.

Everyone has pet peeves and the fact that many are killing the English language is one of mine…
…hence the title ‘KillingLinguist’.

Note…My three ‘…’ are not under fire here so please leave them behind…behind let them be (said in my Yoda voice) leave them alone…;0
Also to be left alone is my fascination with capitalizing proper nouns…I am aware they are not meant to be capitalized.
If you want to attack me I’ll pull out my inner Yoda.

I’m going to be obnoxious here and mark prepositions with an *…
...after it*
…after each one.
(Don’t worry I’ll get bored of that eventually I’m sure.)

Prepositions seem to* be* confusing to* most Americans. Did We (the royal 'We'…meaning the masses) not study them in* school?
Simply put…a preposition is a connecting word.

The WORST offense to* my ears and eyes are…
…”Where you going to*?”
…”Where you at*?”
First off they forgot the ‘ARE’…
…”Where ARE you going to*?”
…”Where ARE you at*?”
Two ways to fix My problem that You have is…
…”Where are you going?”
…”Where are you?”
If you insist on using a preposition you need to connect it…although this is also a waste of your breath and my time as well because it’s still wrong. It’s just something people like to think is ok…it’s not though.
…”Where are you going to* Bitch?”
…”Where are you at* Douche Bag?”

Exclusions example…...
1. "Where are you coming from*?”
That’s ok.
2. “From* where are you coming?”
Nobody I know speaks like* this.

Now…
Please read these next lines ALOUD as the all powerful Yoda, the greatest cunning linguist of all time, albeit from a galaxy far, far away...

“Young pad wan, solution I have!"

"Like Yoda we all speak."

"Problems end they will."

"Prepositions not matter and behind us now."

"Life better it will be."

"Have more fun we must."

"Stop the bitching I may…” This is doubtful.

"New problem find I can."

"Pee my pants laughing I will, though with you not at you.”

“Killing many Linguists with sabers we will.”

Note…Stop I don’t want…ceasing difficult when channelling Yoda…
…ending point I must!

“Harry Potter my Children watch they do.”

"Get off my Mac I must.”

…;)

Crave

This is a shout out to lovers of all things delicious, meaty and messy!

Sometimes I Crave a sandwich or a burger…
I prefer them to be sloppy with condiments and fixings oozing down my hands till I have to knife and fork it.
I’m not a salad and a glass of water kinda gal.

I had to put my fashizzle back together

F16 and I headed to Crave the other day...
…and today I still Crave it.
A burger joint that puts shame on any other burger joint I’ve been too.
A myriad of fattening combinations that …
...if you eat the whole thing you’ll probably intake enough calories for a week and your allowance of fat for a month….
Ahhhhhh...to be an American!

What’s awesome and different about this place is those burger choices are ALSO the sandwiches sans the burger…glorious absurd choices that make odd sense and excite your taste buds.
For girls like F16 and me we were thankful to see the other side of the menu…you can have all the joys of your burger…with out the burger. We may not be ‘salad’ girls but we still need to watch our calorie in-take.

So we ordered...

...Colorado: Shredded lamb, poblanos, onions, pepper jack cheese, avocado, chipotle mayo and tomatoes. $11.00

...Dim Sum Daffy: Roasted duck, ginger garlic cream cheese, red pepper, avocado, lettuce, onion, crispy wontons, hoisin.

$11.00

Our sides were sweet potato fries and fried pickles.
The fried pickles were a bit on the salty side (and $2 more)…that is the ONLY bad thing I have to say.
We split our sandwiches in half so we could both try them…
The lamb and the duck were not gamey, but tender and flavorful.

I would love to describe the flavors…but I’m an Un-Holy Trinity and there was a party in my mouth!
The bread was a perfect softness, I’m not gonna call it a bun…buns are often dry and unappetizing.
The roasted peppers, on both sandwiches added even more flavor and were perfect additions.
OH!…and the crispy wonton on the  Dim Sum Daffy…was an excellent extra of crunch!

Yeah…whatev…I’m raving about a burger joint and we didn’t even have a burger….that’s why I have to go back!
They also have milkshakes, which, because of calorie and fat content I HAD to skip but they looked SOooo yummy and even have Adult ones…
…F1 is ‘spirit’ filled so I’ll have to bring her so we all can share one…or two.

http://craverealburgers.com/

My bad if you don’t live here and don’t have one near you…’cause you are missin’ out!

The Piss And Drop Line

Anyone that has to drive their little People to school in the morning and drop them off might feel my pain…

They call it the ‘Kiss and Drop’ line.
Tricia re-named it appropriately the ‘Piss and Drop’ line.
It’s a trainwreck driven by retarded mentally slow Moms and Dads.

Note…I break a lot of rules. I do not break rules that inconvenience people though. I don’t think.

There is a 4 way stop sign at an intersection next to the school. I was always under the impression that the first person to reach the intersection was the next to go. However at this intersection you would be mistaken if you had such a thought.
Many times N, the nice cross walk lady is stopping traffic to get Children across the street…and you might be sitting there awhile and some Asshole other person to your left or right in front of you that HASN’T been waiting and has just stopped at said stop sign decides after the little people get across that they are more important than you and oblivious to their surroundings edge forward.

…This happens to me daily.
…Today I yelled at some idiot that it wasn’t their turn. She looked at me like I was the devil...I’m just an Un-Holy Trinity though.


 

So we have two lanes coming from two directions when dropping off our Children. None of this is complicated but you would think that to some it’s like splitting atoms. 

If you come from the north you go into the lane north lane. If you come from the other direction you go into the other lane as to not hold up traffic.
People hold up traffic ALL the time.

Yesterday this event took place… it’s a common occurrence in the morning. I’m not sure if he doesn’t trust our very nice Librarian or Gym teacher to get his Children across the cross walk or not. I would be insulted if I were either Teacher. He’s lucky I didn’t get out of my car and open up a can of whoop ass on him…but I know that I’m not SUPPOSED to get out of my car.

In the afternoon it’s almost worse. I park my car legally on the street and walk up to get my Children. Many Mom’s get out of their cars and visit with their friends mean while the bell has rung and they are nowhere to be found leaving a well laid plan in shambles. 

…with cars and minivans unable to move forward.

This Idiot retard mentally slow person vex’s me daily. I can’t turn down the street sometimes because the bus can’t stop at the stop sign and there is another car parked…legally on the other side of the street. I’ve told her it’s against the law. She just ignores me. I think she’s one of my Haters…

This is Me yesterday. I got pulled over for blocking an intersection. I was VERY embarrassed. The people in front of me though…one particular AssHole put me in a position that I could not remove MySelf from. I did not get a ticket because the nice Police Officer saw what had happened.

I’m sure My Haters were laughing at Me.

I don’t think this is gonna make me any Friends…I don’t think I care anymore.
I do hope however you enjoyed my fancy illustrations.

The McRib

Yesterday after I picked up my son from Korean school I decided to treat my Children because I had been to lazy to go to the grocery store and didn’t think ramen would be acceptable two days in a row.
One wanted Subway the other two wanted McDonalds.
While at Subway I ordered Myself an Italian BMT….(thankfully, but I’ll get to that later.)
We headed to McDonalds which is the official restaurant of the Olympics (????!!!!)

How many Olympians actually eat McDonalds?... and do you really think it would be a good choice if you are in-training to be one of our great athletes?

So there I am in the drive thru and I see the McRib on the menu.
My inner black man starts screaming at me!!! I can say this...I may be white but I’m African American for reals...
I’ve never had a McRib before.
I have a commercial flashback, similar I think to an LSD flashback because I’m about to do something retarded mentally slow…
…McRib commercials stream into my gray matter all at once, brazen rainbows dazzling my psyche, birds start chirping in a language only I can understand…
I am no longer in control…I have no clue where Me and Myself are either!

Me…”We would like to have a McRib, 2 Quarter Pounders…please, thank you…yada, yada, yada.”

We get home with all our fashizzle and set the table up.

A picture is worth a thousand words but I’m to unindustrious to count mine…

I open up my shiny container with the knowledge of an Oracle that there is nothing magic in the box and I will be disappointed…

My first bite was…
…of uninteresting bread topped with sesame seeds…for flavor?…
Then my teeth bite through an object that can only be described as solidified wall paper paste with a sauce, BBQ…?…bland, weak and tame.
What’s the big deal?
Is the commercial so enveloping we can not see what we KNOW to be true?!
It’s shit in a satiny package!...made of cardboard.
I look at the McRib that I have bitten into…I give it another go, maybe it’s just me…

That’s SUPPOSED to be pork?…product!

The inside looks like left over flesh after a cosmetic surgical procedure following a season of the biggest loser. 

I’ve seen hot dogs made of more austere pig parts than this mess...

You can put pickles, onions and some dreadful sauce…you can shape this monstrosity of meat product (I did not cross that out on purpose)…into an artful pose but it will always be…

…a temptation to never order one again…

I ate my BMT from Subway————>

That I had ordered earlier...

A quarter of it anyway…thankful I had REAL food to sink my teeth into…something with flavor

Does High School Ever End?

I wasn’t the most popular kid in school. I was friends with different people from different groups. The Goth’s, the Jock’s, the Geek’s, the Surfer’s, the Skater’s...
I was a bit of a freestyler, flirting around hoping to make someone’s day better.

Lot’s of people look back at High School and remember drama galore. I think there was drama because it’s a time when young people have hormones rushing through their juvenile bodies and they’re still getting used to it.

I don’t remember to much drama…drama came later in life.

It started when I married my now Ex…a Squadron encompassing a whole bunch of Spouse’s Women some of whom had nothing to do but get in other people’s business.
http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2010/11/im-barbie.html
Things got worse as he moved up the ranks…I was shocked at the amount of talking behind backs…and to faces about shit that was no-bodies business…
…Oh and the rumor mill was a factory headed by Spouse’s Women with a retarded mentally slow point of view.
There were...
Control freaks of Spouse’s Women for no other reason than their Husband Spouse had some fancy decoration on their shoulder. (Just a handful, thank the heavens.)
Then you had other Spouse’s Women who felt snubbed at the most innocent things and started a rampage...
…’So and so is not attending my Pampered Chef party!..what nerve, I’m not going to her social!’
When I was the President of the Officers Wives Club, stop laughing and clean up the mess you just made all over your computer I know you just spit out your Starbucks. My goal then was to entwine the Enlisted Spouses Club with the OWC and get rid of the conventional ideas of what the OWC was and who the members were. We all know I’m a ‘little’ out of the box.
I was hoping I could change people’s perceptions…it’s something I’m still working on.
It was ridiculous.
It was so High School sometimes.

Note…It was also great times filled with amazing friends.

I’m now a Mom and my life is very different than it used to be…
My Children attend school (Elementary my dear Watson) and I have my clique I hang out with as we stand and wait for our Children to be unleashed upon us released when the bell rings.
Yes, I’m in a clique. That’s the only way I can describe it if you are looking from the outside in. The view from the inside though, these Women are my tried and true Friends and we support each other through hard times and laugh till we cry through good ones.
I walk up to the school and smile a genuine smile when I’m able to make eye contact with people I know and those I don’t.

I know there are people that don’t like me. I like to say it’s just because I exist.
I have the Hater Nation, I know it…
...Funny story now about Member #2…
…the other day I had to go to my Children’s school...as I was walking up a car pulls to the curb and the passenger got out. This was at the moment we would cross paths. It was the Dwarf, member #2. I’m right there and what does she do but RUNS into the school…away from me so she doesn’t have to walk with me.
Remember I had apologized to her, a sincere one at that because I’m the 'big’ person (I was even wearing flats) and it seemed I had hurt her feelings by just being me…if I say it I mean it…she refused to accept it then talked shit about me publicly on her FB page.
Whateve…game on right?! Don’t fuck with me.
I get into the office at the school and she’s standing there…
Me…”Hey, D___” with the biggest smile on my face. I’m not gonna ignore someone.
She looked at me like I had murdered her family.

It doesn’t bother me, not one bit. I would rather be nice to someone that doesn’t like me than anything else...

There is another woman at the school whom I have complimented in the past.

Note...I don’t think Women get complimented enough so if I see that someone has put effort into themselves I make it my goal to let them know that someone has noticed…I've stopped strangers in Target for God’s sake.

…Anywho…this woman which I have had interaction with (a few times) ignores me with glee and she looks right at me and then diverts her eyes with such quickness she must get headaches from it.
…and she’s not the only one.
Was it something I said?
Was it something I did?

This is Elementary School not High School!…and I don’t even attend it(?)!

This is something that gives Women a bad name and bothers the shit out of me.
Bitchy Women with nothing better to do than hold a grudge about something they created in their unstable retarded mentally slow minds.
(This is me talking shit…it’s deserved though.)

I’m not the cause of you unhappy marriage.
I’m not the cause of your Child having problems in school.
I’m not the cause of your money problems.
I’m not the cause of your unhappy life.
I’m not the cause of whatever problem you decided you couldn’t take responsibility for so you needed a  scapegoat….bhahahaabahahhaa (my goat sound).

Oh, and if you have started rumors or start rumors about me…I’m totally used it.
If you’re not talkin’ about me you’re not thinkin’ about me.