Mac And Cheese

First off…I didn’t grow up with Mac and cheese as a kid. I grew up with east Indian curries as a staple.
When we moved back to the good ol’ US of A I was introduced to boxed ‘kraft’ mac and cheese. I hated it. There was nothing complex and had no dimension to it…Flat, bland and out of a card board box with some un-holy, before there was Snookie orange, orange powder…Add milk and butter…whatev…

I took that box as a teenager and made it a great tasty snack that Gwen;), Laura, Jane and I would eat after school…
Make said box of Mac and cheese…sans (that means without) milk or butter
In a pan heat up 2 Tbs butter
Add
1/2 chopped onion
1/2 chopped green pepper
saute till limp(?) about 3 min on med high heat
Add
1 can of diced tomatoes, juice and all and cook for 3 more min(ish)
Add to mac and cheese, grind pepper to taste in it and eat it up.
I still eat this to this day. It’s easy and quick.

I grew up sorta had Children of my own…that love Mac and cheese.
Keeping in mind that my Mom didn’t make homemade Mac and cheese…I taught myself by reading books and shiz…
I came up with something that’s a cross between Mac and Cheese, Alfredo and Carbonara.

Pasta…
What kind of pasta you use is important, it needs to hold the sauce and the solids you put in your sauce.
My favorite is Campanelle. It has a place where a pea fits perfectly, ya know about the size of a Child’s nostril.

Make your pasta according to the directions on the box, drain and cool off with water and sprinkle with olive oil so as not to find a sticky situation when ready to add to your sauce.

Cheese…
I implore you…grate your own cheese!!!
#2... It’s cheaper…
#1…Cellulose is what keeps your pre-grated cheese from sticking. Cellulose is powdered wood pulp. Now, I’m not a girl opposed to putting some wood in my mouth (my choice of course).
…skip the wood till after dinner ladies.

Grate/shred your choice of cheese’s…I like a variety.
Parmesan, gouda, cheddar…mix it up and get crazy.
Make sure you have 3 Cups worth.
Reserve 1/2 cup for the topping.

Veggies…
Yes, vegetables!

Butternut squash… It adds a sweetness and also nutrients to something already delicious and full of fat…my-as-well try to make it semi good for us.
I grate/shred it…There is a reason why I do this…it’s harder for my LoveBug to pick it out.
1 cup.

Garlic…1 clove smashed and chopped.

Onion…1/2 finely chopped.

Peas…frozen please!
1 1/2 cups.

Meat…
Bacon or Panchetta.
It depends on who I’m making it for…for my Children…Bacon.
2 slices cut up and browned and drained.
It’s not imperative to have the meat in there…but it’s better with it.

Now that I have said my piece...on to the recipe…
I’m hoping you have your mis a plas (I think that's French for all your shit together and ready to go).

Hopefully you have made your pasta and set it aside.

2 slices bacon or panchetta cut up, browned and drained.
Put to the side.

Saute in pan on med high heat…for about 4-5 minutes.
1 Tbs olive oil
1 Garlic clove...smashed and chopped
1/2 Onion... finely chopped
1 cup Butternut squash…shredded.
Remove from pan and set to the side.

I’m assuming you know to clean out your pan.

In pan melt
3Tbs butter
then add
1/3 Cup of flour …
add a pinch of salt and 3 or 4 grinds of pepper
Cook on med heat for 2 or 3 minutes (you wanna cook the raw flour flavor out)

Add
3 Cups Skim milk
Stir with a whisk until thickened about 5 to 7 minutes…keep a watch on it so it doesn’t stick.

Add your 2 cups of cheese and stir in…this is a good time to taste for salt.
The reason I didn’t mention salt above because it depends on the cheese you use…different ones have different salt contents…Parm is saltier than cheddar. So taste and add salt to your liking.

Add your veggies you sautéed earlier and set aside to include your peas and bacon you already fried up in a pan.

Stir that shiz all together…with your pasta...
Put it all in an oven proof dish...

In a sperate bowl add 1/2 Cup of Panko (you can use regular bread crumbs if that’s all you have, Panko is better though) and your 1/2 cup of cheese you set aside…per these really jacked up, very long, wordy directions.
Sprinkle on top of your pasta.

Bake @350 for 15 to 20 minutes.

Seriously good luck and I hope you read through this several times as I made it confusing for sure!

My Period, it’s not just a bloody mess

The last two days it’s felt like my uterine lining was angry at me as it tried to claw its way out of my body; tired of my narcissistic, Un-Holy ways AKA I’m gonna get my period and all that clawing is gonna leave me with a bloody mess.
I swear I did nothing to make it angry with me…other than being a Woman.

I drank tons of water so as to discover I was not in my “first trimester”…the more water I drink, the more I go pee and more chance of me seeing…

…”Wahoooooooo…” I can get on with my life.

…And do a happy dance with maybe a fist pump here or there.

This is not because I’m scared I’m pregnant. Nope, it’s that waiting for the start of it is stressful. When it starts I know it's the beginning and I can count the days for it to be over! 

Sometimes we wake up, go pee and…BAM!

Surprise, a day or two early…

…”Mother fucker…I hate this!”

It’s so irritating…I know I’ve written about it before but realistically this is the real deal.

http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2011/01/red-tentperiod-aunt-dot-niddah.html

The above blog is probably one of my better written trainwrecks about this subject.

My abdomen…

I’ve been picking my clothes carefully the last couple of days..’cause that’s what Women do a couple days before their cycle starts they get their period.

I put a dress on the other day, it was a soft gray and ankle length with an empire waist. I looked in the mirror, turned to the side and HOLY SHIZ! I looked like I was in my second trimester! The bloating was out of control! I put on my size 3 juniors levi’s and HOLY SHIZ!

Muffins anyone?

My Period does not just wreak havoc in my neither regions...

My breasts boobs…

The other day it hurt my nipples when I put my bra on…After I got it on I was grateful for the T-shirt bra that separated my nipples from the, what would have felt like sand paper against my nipples, silk shirt.
I woke up in the morning and my breasts boobs felt like they had grown 2 sizes and I was now a 34 DD…OVER NIGHT…much to my dismay they didn’t look it, they just felt like it…or that someone had been punching the sides of my breasts boobs in a very rude manner that caused them to feel this dreadful…like they are/were bruised all over…but with no marks.

My face…

I swear I go to sleep several nights before my period starts with toothpaste on my face; as I try to rid myself of those marks on my face that scream to the public that hormones are raging through my system…and I will soon join the Women in the Red Tent for I will be unclean.

It’s a pain in my...

There you are in the midst of this bloody mess (that’s a British term) and that first night or the night before you are kept up as the pain sweeps through your love area…
I woke up last night from a dream…
Allah (yes, I just said that) saying to me as he squeezes my barren uterus in a death grip…
…”This is your punishment for your heathen ways Witch! Cover your flesh and respect all Men for they cannot control themselves around you!"

As far as my emotions go…

Well, I’m not really a chick (a guy can be a chick) these days, a Woman yes, not overly sensitive and relatively grounded compared to others I have found.
However…
I find I’m more pessimistic in the days before. I worry about things like: the dirt on the floor…more than I would on normal days.
I’m also meaner. I will put up less with people’s unreasonable, illogical, superficial, inconsiderate  ways…My patience is not all there.
I truly wonder if that saying applies…

“My 

greatest 

fear 

is that 

there is

 no PMS 

and this

 is

 my personality."

Am I just masking my true self the others days/weeks in the month and hiding who I really am?!
I try to reign myself in…knowing that this is just part of my monthly cycle of life(?) Nah…No life will grow there, in me that is…
And if I ever did get pregnant it would be a "fucking miracle"…No really, it would.

I’ve been dealing with this monthly since I was 13 years old…I’m 40…you would think I had gotten used to it.

Sam, An Angel Sent From God

The trials of life are different for each one of us. We are shaped by events in our lives but how we choose to handle these events can define us…victim, martyr, survivor, hero, inspiration...

One of the things that gets me through difficult times is my perspective on life. It is one of the biggest challenges for myself and my goal is to help others see something from a different perspective…
It’s also one of my biggest messages...

On a daily basis I think of a 10 year old boy I have never met.
Sam.
I know his Mother from High School, we are Facebook friends. We are not close but I think and pray(?) for her Son, her and their family.
I asked her if I could share his story that inspires me to see the big picture…

These are his Mothers’s words…


'He is such an inspiration to me and so many other people. I was driving home from 
the gym today and God was reminding me of what a blessing Sam is. I truly believe 
that Sam is an angel sent to my family to help us to see what life is truly about. So 
many people feel sorry for him or us because of his physical disability.... but I feel 
the total opposite.. Don't feel sorry for us, we lead a much fuller and richer life 
because we have Sam. 


He has taught me not to take things for granted.. not to 


waste time with petty things, and to truly enjoy life to 


it's fullest.. and most importantly.. always have a smile. 


Sam is rarely without a smile. 


As far as all he has gone through... it is a lot. Sam was born with…
...spina bifida
…hydrocephalus
...Arnold Chiari Malformation II. 
He has nerve damage to his legs from below his knee down and also to his bowel 
and bladder. 
He has had a total of 21 surgeries since birth. The first two surgeries occured when 
he was one day old. He is 10 years old now. He had about 6 surgeries in his first few 
years of life. One spine and 6 brain surgeries. 
From there we had 3 marvelous surgery-free years. 
During this time Sam worked hard at therapy and learned how to walk. He would fall 
and look up at me and smile and say "Try,Try Again Mommy!!" He did it too! By 
kindergarten he threw his canes aside and walked his entire day! From there he had 
one surgery a year for 3 years. 
Then When he was 8 he started having a lot of medical issues. In the past 2 1/2 
years he has had 12 surgeries. A few on the legs and the rest on his spine and brain. 
He also had many amazing times during this 2 1/2 years. He was granted a Make a 
Wish and went on the Disney Cruise, he was given a free handcycle, He was granted 
his very own service dog, Ledger, and he had a miracle occur medically, where he 
was able to pee and poo all on his own for the first time ever in his life, at the age of 
10. 
As far as fund raising goes.. Sam has amazing medical insurance and all his bills are paid in full. However, if you want to still raise money for Sam, we would love for any money collected to go back to New Horizon's Service Dogs. They give out hundreds of dogs to people with disabilities and military people who are coming back from the war with PTSD. They never charge anyone for the dogs. Sam's dog Ledger came at the most crucial time in his life. Ledger has been able to go to the hospital and all of Sam's dr. appts. It has changed the whole experience. Where it once took Sam over a week to get out of the hospital... he now gets out in about 5 days. Much quicker recovery time and a much happier experience all together, for Sam, me and the doctors and nurses."


I really wonder what Sam’s big picture is…
Sometimes for me a thank you just doesn't cut it and the act of giving back is what my heart drives me to do.
I don’t have a lot to give but I can give more back to Sam and Ledger by sharing this story with a link to New Horzon’s Service Dog site in hopes that you are grateful for your own health and also find the inspiration in his story that I do…on a daily basis.

http://www.newhorizonsservicedogs.org/

Many of my friends that read this know Wendy and Sam. They are a real family. He is a real boy that has overcome more than most of us in his 10 years that most of us will in a life time.

Wendy, thank you for letting me share this…peace and love girl. and always, your family is in my heart…and on my mind.

Single Parenthood, Not The Fake Kind

This is my first guest blogger…THINK!!!!!!!!!!! …and thank you for sharing this story with us…guest blogger;)

*This is only the beginning to a blog that isn't public. I was asked to share it. I couldn't figure out the "custom" feature to the privacy function, or it would only be visible to a handful.*

  Parenting young children is hard work. Being the sole parent to young children is harder work. A rant? Maybe. Informative? To some. Maybe. A completely foreign perspective? To many. My purpose? To reduce a stigma and possibly reach a narrow minded, selfish, judgmental demographic which views itself as the epitome of perfection.

            There are many unique occurrences that leave a person to parent alone. Some are voluntary, some not so much. Divorce, wedlock, artificial insemination and death only name a few. I experienced the death of a spouse, four weeks after our second child was born. The hand that I had been dealt included new obstacles. Many I have overcome, yet many more await.

            Single parenthood can most easily be compared to being socially outcast. Let’s take a “Kids Eat Free” scenario as our first example, shall we? Most restaurants only allow one child to eat for free per paying adult. Hotels often observe this very same policy. Next, let’s examine a traditional childhood memory: riding a carousel. Seems easy, right? A parent stands next to their child, who has picked out their horse of choice. Simple? Not when you’re trying to convince your second child that riding on the bench, or in the sleigh, really is cool, and no, grannies aren’t the only ones who utilize these. Buffets? Out of the question. One can only carry so many plates. These are a few public reminders. There are also private ones. Recently, my five year old asked, “Mommy, what’s a widow?” I began to explain that it’s a lady whose husband had passed away. I was ready for the correlation. His response, “Well, that’s a weird spider! So, no black widows have spider husbands?” This is the same five year old who has stated, on more than one occasion, “I wish my dad never got in his car. I wish he had ridden with you, Mommy. You never crash!”

            To the individual(s) who feel the FAA should implement a new regulation barring parents of small children from flying with them: we gladly accept your donations towards a private jet for our future travel needs. I was once on a flight from Colorado Springs to Baltimore with a well-behaved baby and toddler. In my carry on were the cremated remains of a service member. Just a random service member? No, of course not, this is not some sick hobby of mine. I was transporting the remains of my late husband, the father of my children, to Arlington National Cemetery. Yes, the Air Force offered me an escort. I chose the option that would be less awkward for me, and also the one that drew the least amount of attention to my children and myself.

            Prior to this flight, my children had flown many times, to include intercontinentally.  We had a routine. My children did not cry out or otherwise annoy fellow passengers; in fact, they slept for the duration of the trip! As I took my seat next to an older, heavyset gentleman, I noticed him rolling his eyes and sighing at the sight of one adult and two children. He asked the flight attendant whether there were any open seats available on the plane, and explained that he would like to be moved as he did not feel that it was fair that the only two children on the plane were seated nearest to him. What he couldn’t hear were my thoughts. He didn’t look as though he were physically able to share an armrest. The circumference of his arm was equal to, or maybe even greater than, the thickest part of my thigh. I kindly asked him for the other half of my seat belt, as he was sitting on it and hadn’t even noticed! As he turned to retrieve it, I noticed that he had more dried food on his shirt than my six month old and two and a half year old, combined. Nice, right?! I accommodated his constant trips to the lavatory, his constant coughing/throat clearing and excessive flatulence. My kindness did not stop there. I set up his tray table with the drink he had ordered before he fell asleep, and reminded him of the e-reader that he placed in the seat back pocket and nearly forgot about as we were gathering our belongings upon arrival.

            My responsibilities do not end with my children. I still feel that I have a moral obligation to those around me. I don't like to see people struggle. If I can help, I do. Sometimes, helping others is a minor inconvenience to me. I still follow through. To this day, I wonder if the man seated next to me on that flight ever considered paying my kindness forward, as he never even uttered the words “thank you”. 

The Polarization Of America: Pro-Life/Pro-Choice

Abortion/Termination, I don’t care what you call it but there is a reason why someone would call it one thing and not another.
It’s perspective.
For some it’s a matter of their Religious views or right/wrong.
For some it’s a matter of the right to choose what happens to their body. They can be Religious or not.

When I was a teenager my Dad had a talk with me…
…”You have to pick.”
And I did; Pro-Choice (not because of Religious conviction). That was 24 years ago though and several years ago I came to the conclusion that NOTHING is Black or White.

I’ve known several women that have terminated(?) the life(?) that grew in them. They all did it with the heavy weight that only a Woman can understand. They did it for their own reasons.
I said…"that only a Woman can understand”, because a Man will never have to be burdened with this choice(?).
Anytime you have sex you need to acknowledge that there could be consequences for your actions and you better hope that your nuva ring is ‘installed' properly and that he wore a condom.
A Woman can get pregnant even if she uses birth control, accidents do happen…can you call the creation of life an accident?
The Woman IS burdened with the responsibility.
If a Man and a Woman have a one night stand (I’m not saying it’s right, just that it does happen) and she gets pregnant…
The Woman IS burdened with the responsibility.

My 3 Children were adopted.
Their Biological Mothers were burdened with the heavy weight of carrying these Children to term and I am SO THANKFUL they did…
However, even though I am the Mother of 3 adopted Children…
I’m a realist; rape, health issues and such are also reasons but…
...I say this knowing that the majority of the Women that make this hard decision do it as a form of birth control, most often only once. I also believe it’s not a flippant choice they make.
I truly believe it is not my right to stand in judgement of someone else’s choice.

The Religious Right would most likely say these Women are going to hell(?) if they don’t or haven’t invited(?) accepted(?) Jesus into their lives and asked for forgiveness…
My thought is that they are already living in that hell.

The over all debate is…
…”When do we call it(?) life?
The 'morning after pill’…potential life is being executed(?).

For most Women the morning after pill is a God send, pun intended.

To go a little bit deeper…
As far as the Catholic church is concerned a man cannot even “jizz off” masturbate I hope privately because the potential for life exists in sperm.
Show me a Man, Catholic or not and I’ll show someone that masturbates.

Matt. 7:1 “How can you say to your brother, 'let me take that speck out of your eye’, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye.”

I know I do not want to travel back in time to the days of back alley abortions(?) terminations(?)...

I’m Pro-Life for myself.
I’m Pro-Choice for someone else.
It is the dilemma that We that are middle of the road…not liberal, not conservative, live with…it’s not that we can’t make a choice/decision…We most certainly can! We also know that we are not in the right to make a decision for someone else.

To talk about this subject I also HAVE to bring up the death penalty.
 ... I extend my Pro-Life stand with concerns to the death penalty as well.
You cannot truly be Pro-Life and also believe in the Death Penalty.
But often conservatives are Pro-Life and Pro-Death Penalty.
Liberals are often Pro-Choice and Anti-Death Penalty.

I would love to say that I am Against the Death Penalty because I am Pro-Life…
It is not for that reason that I oppose it though…as my heart sinks...
I’m a realist...
I oppose it because sometimes someone is wrongly accused but more importantly, it’s more expensive to put someone on Death Row than it is to keep them in prison for Life.
I don’t wanna pay for that!

It saddens me that there is a portion of society that believes things are black and white…their way or the highway…I’m on that highway…driving in the middle of the road trying not to get hit!…I believe I am an average American with realistic middle of the road views…we lack a voice and the propaganda skills that the left and the right use to gather followers(?).

• 
  

Portion Control

My LittleGuy several years ago

I had a huge scare and wake up call with my LittleGuy.
http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2012/03/type-2-diabetes.html

His health over all is VERY good, except his weight…which I now have implemented change in our diets…nothing freaky…I believe in moderation, but I like food. I like meat, that’s why we have molars, for chewing meat. Sorry all you vegetarians, you are missing out. Plus we are all gonna die one day, we should enjoy that which we consume…

Note…When LittleGuy was a baby and reached the monumental age of 1 I threw the formula away and did something some people would not agree with…I didn’t go to whole milk as recommend, I went straight to skim milk…I knew even then this adorable ‘little’ baby was not little and hadn’t been since I cut his cord. He didn’t like baby food and wanted normal food as well; so sometimes I would take the lasagna I made and puree it so he could eat with us and stop throwing fits…his nose works fine as do his taste buds, always have.

However…
I’m a normal Mom of three Children and sometimes the convenience of them helping themselves to bowl upon bowl of sugar laden cereals while I get ready in the morning…is a HUGE convenience!

I made a big mistake.
I put my Childs health at risk and I’m ready to burden myself with that thought and responsibility. Yes, genetics are taken into account when it comes to concerns to Diabetes, but I sat there and watched him gain weight. I do feed my Children healthy home-cooked meals and we really don’t eat a ton of processed foods, but I admit they eat granola bars, fruit snacks, pop tarts and such…WE ARE NORMAL.

My Sons are hungry growing boys and genetically totally opposite of each other.
They eat relatively the same amount, although LittleGuy does consume a bit more I admit.
LoveBug never stops moving, that little human of mine is rail thin, he eats a fair amount though.
LittleGuy doesn’t move like his brother.
My Girl, BrownNut, food is not really on her radar unless edamame or strawberries are on the table.
LittleGuy is actually more inclined to eat a variety of foods and doesn’t turn his nose up at vegetables .

I always have fresh seasonal fruit out to snack on.
I don’t have soda in the house.
They drink water when they are thirsty…from the tap. The bottled water you drink most likely also comes from the tap.
I only have skim milk in the ‘fridge.
I allow them 4 to 6 oz of orange juice in the morning…juice to me is empty calories…
…”Eat a piece of fruit if you want the flavor of said fruit.” is what I tell them.
We don’t eat dessert very often, it’s a special treat.
(It helps I don’t have a sweet tooth.)
The above list are things I DON’T HAVE TO CHANGE…that’s also part of our normal, along with the Pop-Tarts.

What we have to change is our awareness of what and how much we are taking in and look at portion control, calorie intake, fat content and such.
They are aware already the difference between good foods and bad foods, that’s not a problem.

I also have to do it so LittleGuy or one of my other two Children don’t become obsessive? compulsive? and end up with food related mental issues.

Our/My first focus is...
Teaching them to read nutrition labels and what is an actual healthy portion/serving size.

Yesterday, LittleGuy came home from school and was ready to snack…
He wanted a Pop-Tart. We got the box down and we read the label. A single serving size is one Pop-Tart, not the 2 that come in the foil wrapper like you would think.
I then proceeded to get out some hummus, his favorite whole grain pretzels and his favorite vegetable, sugar snaps.
We took the time again to look at the labels and serving sizes…
2Tbs of hummus
9 pretzels
1 1/3 C’s of Sugar Snaps.
Together we measured everything out and that was his snack.

This morning for breakfast I didn’t change a lot. The cereal was still out…along with measuring cups this time.
All three of them measured 3/4 C of cereal (a serving size) into their bowls…stunned looks on their faces and said…
…”That’s all we get?! This is unfair Mom!”
I didn’t leave it there. I told them they could have another serving of cereal. Realistically they do need to eat and 3/4 of cereal is not gonna fuel many people for the start to their day. There was yogurt and fruit too, that’s normal.
We (my Children) understand now that if they fill their bowls up once…that’s 2 serving sizes and you really don’t need to measure everything…

I’ve almost always used small bowls for myself if I am having a snack. For myself I understand portion control but never really applied it to my Children. I have sometimes, but not all the time. These little humans are growing still and I’m trying not to.

Many of this is logical but real life scenario of on the run Mom’s or Dad’s we don’t really have the time to read every label…but if your Child has an allergy you would I bet.
My Children don’t have food related allergies…

This was all written by a woman that has some mad skills in the kitchen and is very humble too that makes healthy meals almost all the time, most often from scratch…
…our problem is Portion Control.

Oh…one more point…
You can be skinny and unhealthy.
You can be heavy and still be healthy.
Yes, extra weight does put more pressure on your organs, I’m gonna try to ease that pressure…knowing full well that in all likely hood my LittleGuy, named LittleGuy because he’s my youngest, will always be  a bit bigger, because God makes all of us different.

Type 2 Diabetes?

I don’t know if this life event is nature or nurture…

I’m the Mother of 3 amazing Children, all adopted. None of them had prenatal care but have been almost the epitome of good health since their birth.
…I’ve run into a problem, a health one.

Their Dad is in really good shape, as am I(ish).

My Daughter, BrownNut, is petite(ish), being most Peruvians are petite(ish).

My Son, LoveBug, is Korean and almost a dang ninja, all stealth like and fast.

LittleGuy, is half black a 1/4 Puerto Rican and 1/4 caucasian.

My youngest, LittleGuy, is not very little. He’s 71/2 and weighs the same amount as me, 120 lb. He is tall, but his weight is a problem.
At his check ups they would say…
…”He will grow into his weight as he gets taller."
I/we have been mindful of his weight for some time now but I had started to take notice to little changes in his food intake, water intake and energy level.

I told my Ex I was going to make a doctor appointment for LittleGuy and why. My Ex was in agreement and would meet us at the appointment.

We talked to the Doctor, the Doctor talked to us, the three of us.

We are going to do lab tests on Friday.
…no matter what we have to make some changes.

Tuesday night Kat and I took all 5 of the Children to Chili’s, we had a coupon, 2 kids eat free with each adult.
When it came to my LittleGuy to order his dinner in a soft voice (‘’cause in most public places he speaks softly) and full of good manners he says…
…”I’d like to have the pizza please and for my side I’d like the celery sticks.”
He looked at me, winked and said to me…
…”You know, ‘cause of what the doctor said.”

Food is a big part of my life, I like good food. LittleGuy is the same way.
I made pancakes for breakfast this morning and he knew right away I had used a different recipe, buttermilk instead of skim milk, and he said…
…”These taste different, they’re good, but different.”
The other two were clueless.

I often have to tell my Children…”God made each of us different.” LittleGuy is taller than his older siblings and once in awhile it bothers LoveBug. My three Children are very different from one another…

We won’t know anything till the tests come back.
I HAVE to make dietary changes in the mean time, and the pizza and pancakes probably weren’t a good choice.

I hesitate to post this without knowing anything but I do so for one reason…
...This is my life and I share it, because I know someone else might have the same problem and I want you to know you are not alone.

The Military Is Still Part of My Life

Being Divorced I find to be easy these days. I share custody 50/50 with my Ex.
It took probably a year and a half for me to 'get used’ to not having my Children around all the time.
I’m ‘used to it’ now.

His schedule is that of an active duty military member…Tdy’s (trips out of town) expected and unexpected.

The last couple weeks his schedule was all weird…and one Tdy was changed to a week earlier after I had all ready made plans…I canceled plans…
These are my/our Children.

Kat and I had a conversation the other day about how she understands the upheaval of our (my Ex’s) schedule bothers me. Our Children are ok with it unless it’s a last minute change. They like to know things in advance (like me)…like who is picking them up from school.
Once in awhile I’ll get a last minute phone call ‘cause a meeting has gone long. I get it.
Or an E-mail or a text that a meeting has been re-scheduled…for a Thursday or Friday afternoon, around the time school gets out.
My Ex has our children on Thursdays, Fridays, every other Saturday and Sundays.

I am very understanding of his work schedule…I get the Military and how things are run.
However…
We share an on-line calendar…I thought I knew the schedule…
When I picked up my Children from school on Monday my Son had his Korean school backpack. This was my first clue…I checked the on-line calendar. Nope, it hadn’t changed. I was perplexed.

Yada, yada, yada…I brought it up. He thought he had changed it. He fixed it.

Thursday came around…I had told our Children that their Dad was out of town and I would be picking them up. They were cool with it.
Time comes to pick them up and I head to the school…
I’m standing there talking with friends then low and behold…
…My Ex shows up.
We look at each other and I say…
…”You are out of town…what are you doing here?”
Him…”I leave tomorrow and get back Sunday evening.”
Me…”Oh…I thought you were gone all week.”
We laughed.
Better that two parents show up than none.

Back to the schedule…And me getting 'used to it’…
I have long weekends with out my Children every other week unless things are interrupted.
The last couple of weeks I have had my children more than my Ex…Spring Break is coming up and I will have my children every day (week day) for the 2 weeks they have off…It’s right around the corner.

To admit as a Mother that I have come to enjoy, yes, enjoy, the quiet time when my Children are not around is a mixed blessing and pleasure. Yes, I miss them but you can’t miss something if it’s always around.
I appreciate the time I DO have with them more these days.
I also appreciate my ‘time off’ as well…I’m looking forward to the weekend…
…seeing as Spring Break is coming up.