Addiction and Oxycodone

I was watching the movie Traffic awhile ago. A marvelous film about the drug war, Mexico and more importantly addiction.

Since my knee surgery I have had to take Oxycodone.
Oxycodone is the generic version of Percocet and is HIGHLY addictive.

I can’t take over the counter pain relievers because it deters the ‘dead people’ part in my knee from adhering to the holes that were drilled into my bones and then inserted and held there with screws.
…and to be totally honest I don’t think they would do a damn thing for me anyway.
I am a very active woman with a lot on my plate and by 12 in the afternoon all I usually want to do ice my knee so it’s numb. It hurts all the time. Sometimes I wake in the middle of the night with shooting pains. I live in a split level four story house and to get anywhere I have to go up and down stairs. I also workout a little harder than the average woman due to my vanity and I want my leg muscles back in the worst way.

"Take 1 to 2 tablets by mouth every 4 hours as needed”

Well shit, if I did that I couldn’t get anything done. I have people to do and things to be. I have things to do and places to be.

Oxycodone makes me all glassy eyed and and I can’t even feel my knee when I take them…but because I can’t take anything else if I have a headache or any other pain…it’s the only thing I can take.
…So, I would cut them up, into halves and quarters…
I wouldn’t take 2 at a time but sometimes I would take 1 1/2. There were a few(3) days I had to take more than 2, but I wouldn’t allow myself anymore than a total of 3 1/2 a day…those were bad days in the life of my knee and pain management.

I spoke to my Girlfriends and Physical Terrorist Therapist about my concerns about becoming addicted to this drug and how I could manage my pain better.
F1…”We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors, are you sure you don’t already have a problem.” (I think I paraphrased that…but that is what I heard.)
Me…”That is why I am telling you about it and my fears I have OF it.”

My Terrorist Therapist just told me to slow down and is having me do a few things differently. There IS NO slowing down for me though.

Yesterday I had to call the nurse about a refill or the go ahead to take something other than Oxycodone…I WANT something different because I’m scared to death and don’t want to turn into some pill popping waste.

Me…”I want the fame, I don’t want the addictions that comes with it though.”

I’m now taking a new drug…I’ll see how I do.