The Progression Of My Knee

December 17th, 2010 I was involved in a JuJitsu accident while belt testing.
I tore my ACL, MCL and Meniscus in my right knee.
As I laid on the mat the first thought I had was…
…”I feel like the most mature woman in the world right now…I have my own health insurance.”
…I also knew that even with insurance I was going to be out several thousands of dollars in fees and I was grateful I had some savings.

I had other thoughts as well…
…Because I knew I would be fine…I was concerned for Shihan John’s and Sensei Eric’s thought’s. Shihan doesn’t know me well…I have trained mostly in the smaller school with Sensei Eric, who does know me well.
There was no way they could know that I thought of it in the sense of…
…’I’m gonna go on an adventure…”

I also saw it as in my screwed up brain…
…A right of passage.

The other students helped me get home and my Instructors and the Students checked in on me often.

http://behindthebookscover.blogspot.com/2010/12/eliminate-threat-change-focus.html

I wrote the above blog before testing…

I had my surgery on January 31, 2011.

I’d like to thank that dead person for signing up to be on organ donor…
...for without this person…
…I wouldn’t have an ACL.
Holes were drilled into my bones and my donated ACL was screwed in.

The muscles in my once very nice right leg quickly melted into nothing.

I can’t kick, turn, twist or have heavy jolts at all to my knee still.
I can’t even wear any of my fabulous shoes.
I was just, last month, emancipated from the constraints of what had become one of my best friends…my leg brace. Which I had to wear in public and around Children.
My Doc. told me last month knowing how frustrated I have been that…
…”It’s going to take at least a year.”
His honesty was something I didn’t want to hear but I am accepting.
Slowly but surely they will release me so I will be able to participate in the activities I enjoy.

I see my Physical Therapist Terrorist weekly…he’s my friend and my Redheaded wonder.
He rolls the side of my leg and massages it behind my knee. Sometimes I’m brought to the brink of tears.
He also watches me move as I do the workouts he has instructed me to do.
The people I see on a daily basis know that the healing process has been a little more physically painful than I let on publicly.
Sometimes, I hope my Doc. doesn’t read this!…’Cause he’s also my friend…
…when I’m on my feet for an extended amount of time I limp. I try not to, but it hurts. It hurts even when I’m not active and just sitting here while I type away.
It always aches and sometimes...
It feels like…
...a hundred different needles have been inserted into various places in my leg.
I want my pain meds back in the worst way…but I can take it.
The Marines have a saying…
…”Pain is weakness leaving the body.”
At times I think I might be the strongest woman in the world, able to leap tall buildings and such and what have you…but I’m not allowed to jump.

I have worked hard to gain back my muscles and I almost look normal again…almost. My leg no longer looks like a large onion with two lanky roots...

…Enough about that…

Now for some picture of the progression of one knee that was once described by my Doc. as…
…"Mashed Potatoes."

<—My leg after my accident.



My knee after surgery—>

<—The deep bruising ran and pooled all the way to my feet eventually. I still have some bruises remaining in my shin.

I had to keep my bandages dry. So I wrapped my leg in Press and Seal.






The bandages came off slowly—>




I have 5 new scars that I am proud of now.





<—My leg brace did not hinder my going out with my friends.
…and no one could see that I didn’t have a pretty leg under my brace.

I took a lot of courage, being as vain as I am, to eventually venture out in public without my brace and in shorts.




This is my electrical stimulation…—>
I get to control the amount of stimulation . I made it a bit of a game to see how high I could take it. I took it to 200…then decided 165 was my ‘comfort’ point.

You can see that my leg looks almost normal now.



It has been an adventure for sure...one that I would not change.

JuJitsu Belt Testing is this week and I can’t partake in the ‘festivities of pain’…One day in the next, hopefully couple of months, I’ll make it back to class so I can Train, Learn and Earn my next level belt…with the goal to be an Ass Kickin’ Bitchin' Wiccan.

I’ll also be able to run, dance, jump around like a fool, kick, turn, twist and wear fabulous shoes.

OSU!