Divorce: Pro’s and Con’s

Yes, the idea of divorce is a scary. 

I’ve been there done that.

Does it make me an expert?

Yes…

…because I am living proof of a successful, happy divorce.
I’m speaking for myself only. I have no idea if my Ex is happy.
…I do know that had I not taken the steps to remove myself from my toxic marriage my Ex would be a widower. 

Weighing the Pro’s and Con’s…

A.You’re are spiting up your family and afraid you will harm your Children…

There are many schools of thought on this and mine is the only one that matters because I’m right…the others are just wrong.

These are some of the very bad and retarded mentally slow schools of thoughts…that are ruining people and making them second guess themselves as they go slowly insane in a prison of their own making…or one of their spouses making...
1. Some people suggest you should stay married for your children and you are being selfish.
2. There is no such thing as a ‘good’ divorce.
3. Children will grow up and be un-happy and un-successful in relationships because the come from divorced families.


My answer to these retarded mentally slow schools of thought is simple.
It’s better for Children to grow up in a broken home fixed relationship. Where two people can finally admit they were not meant for each other. That way the Children can note and observe a HEALTHY relationship as opposed to a toxic one.
In time they will understand that marriage is complicated and be proud that their parents were smart enough to achieve that which is so looked down upon, a flourishing Divorce.

Note…Divorce is not a bad word for me…it’s a healthy one. I have noticed that since my divorced I have lost ‘friends’ but I know it’s their own loss and not mine.

B. One person will most likely be un-happy and you don’t hate them and wish them no ill  will...

It’s true divorce is not often approached as a democracy but is inclined to be suggested by one member.
The person on the ‘hurting’ end is almost always acting surprised…they had just been lying to themselves for years sometimes. The truth is the most painful thing to hear and admit to themselves.

This does NOT mean they will be un-happy forever. They, with time and maybe a therapist WILL get over it. If they don’t get over it you have to know that it’s THEM NOT YOU that are the source of their unhappiness.

Note…If you are on the outside looking ‘in’ and think it’s the fault of ONE person YOU are wrong. I take a ownership in my own failed marriage and know that I was half the problem. So wake the fuck up. There is nothing for you to judge.

Note to the note…I am obviously not discussing physically abusive relationships. We all know that when one person is physically abused they need to get the fuck out as soon as they can... and we can judge those mother-fuckers people all we want.

C. Finances…

 In this day and age almost everyone is having financial issues…married or not.
My suggestion is to use a Financial Mediator. It doesn’t matter if you have cashola or not...
I have one I highly recommend to people here in Colorado Springs.
http://www.denisatova.com/contact.asp

I have a few things to say now…
There are some people who want to get divorced but haven’t grown a set of balls as big as mine yet. I worry about their sanity.
I have helped and hindered relationships. I must admit this…the hindered part. I know that my view on life is abstract to some but to me it’s just the plain old fucking truth that others can not admit to.
I am a steadfast believer in MARRIAGE. One that is filled with Truth, Honesty, Friendship, RESPECT, Love and lot’s and lot’s of amazing sex.
In the end all I want is for you to be Happy…but that’s another blog...

Note…I realize this is a crappy pro and con comparison and I could and probably will do better and think of more reasons for the “Pro’s and Con’s”….that’s for my book though...