TCMCEA

As a Parent to a 6, 7 and 9 year old you would think The Tooth Fairy and I are pretty tight.
This is not the case.
I am thinking about writing a letter to the…TCMCEA
The Children’s Mythical Creature Endowment Association

The TCMCEA has many members and they continually rape our wallets for the joys of our precious young.
The members of the TCMCEA you are most assuredly acquainted with…
…Santa
…The Easter Bunny
…Leprechauns
…The Tooth Fairy
You get the idea…

Anyway….
My poor 9 year old daughter, who is my oldest and therefore my evolving experiment in parenting keeps losing her teeth.
I am ALWAYS freaking out about it. I’m not a dentist. I have no clue how many teeth a child looses.

My Three Children had their biannual visit to the dentist today.
I learned several things. My 9 year old has many more teeth she will lose.
…and worst of all my youngest has a jacked up front tooth issue and most likely will be having surgery.

…So back to the Tooth Fairy and why we are not very tight…
She is always forgetting our house.

I know for a fact that there are many houses she likes to skip, to include my Ex’s house, so I don’t feel alone in my dislike of this lazy bitch.
She is supposed to be on a secret night mission.
Is it such a secret that it’s kept a secret from her?
NO! I know she’s been briefed.

I imagine all the consorts of the TCMCEA laying on lounge chairs on a beach in Barbados with fruity beverages with umbrellas in them talking smack about us parents and how gullible we are.
They have to have some sort of income…hell, they are in Barbados…and that place is expensive.
When they signed up I’m sure they were given an allowance for items, or money, or coins…and they are spending it on themselves!
We are gullible ‘cause we are doing ALL the work for them and they are on vacation…365/24/7!!!

What if we parents went on strike?
Do you wonder if the red phone would be brought to them and they would finally have to get up off their asses and do what they signed up for?
‘Cause as far as tooth Fairies go…
I think I am the worst replacement she could have ever picked!